Happy Day

I missed posting yesterday, but my day was just so full. I am having a pretty good day today, so no venting this time. I was in the dentist's office today and came across a magazine called Working Mothers. I'd never heard of it before, which is probably because I never stroll down the magazine aisle in stores. It was actually pretty interesting. The only problem is I didn't see very many articles for working class mothers. Pretty much every article dealt with problems for small business owners, those who telecommute, or who have very high profile jobs. In these cases, cost is not really an issue. I mean, one article was about daycare vs. nanny, with cost being the secondary issue. I am wondering if the working class of moms is really included in the "Should moms stay home with kids or find a career" debate? Well, I guess that might be a kind of "dumb" question since these moms don't really have a choice. I remember having a conversation with my sister-in-law, as well as some friends, about this. It feels like it's more difficult to choose since I do have a choice. I struggle with myself because I would love to have a career and be important in that aspect, but I don't think I want to risk the well-being of my children to do it, which I really feel I would be doing. Then again, I see all of these successful women seemingly balancing work and family life. Of course, when they are being interviewed for TV or magazines, we're not getting the full picture, we don't see their everyday life, and other family members may have different opinions on the subject. It would be interesting to see how successful their real lives are. You know, the decision would be so much easier if it wasn't a choice. When I had my first two kids, I had to work because we were young and poor! I never even thought about how not being with them was affecting them. They were kind of used to going to a babysitter every day and seeing their parents part-time. But then, with my third child, I was kind of forced to stay home. My husband's job relocated us, and I was 5 months pregnant - and it was quite obvious I was far along. I really didn't even try to find a job, thinking that no one would hire me at this point, and also feeling obligated to be fair to any company that would hire me by not applying 4 months before I was due! Anyway, we had to tighten up with finances and budget so that I could stay home. When he was born, we decided that me being home was not such a bad thing, and not really hurting us financially. We decided to make this permanent until he started school. In these past 5 years (my youngest just started kinder this year), I have really enjoyed being home with him and also for my older boys when they come home from school. I didn't realize how much I missed out on with my other two boys until I experienced being home with my youngest. At times, I feel really guilty about not giving them that same opportunity. I still remember my older sons asking me (when they were about 7 and 6) why I loved my youngest more than I loved them. I realized that my youngest and I had formed a much closer relationship because we spent all day together and that it was quite apparent to the other two. And I just felt so overwhelmingly guilty. I tried to get them to verbalize why they would say such a thing, and what was said basically proved my theory to be correct - that I had been able to forge a closer bond with the youngest because I was home all day. I have since tried my best to remedy this by spending some alone time with all of them, but deep down I still carry the guilt of never being able to do it all over. I know what's done is done and we can only move forward, but had I known then what I know now......you know the rest. Of course, with all that said, my two older boys aren't the worst for it. They are very well-adjusted, bright, and seem to be really happy with their lives thus far. So I guess I haven't done too bad a job, and maybe my decision to stay home came just in time. I can't be judgemental about other working moms that decide to do the opposite because I don't live in their shoes and maybe their decision to work is the best one for their families. And I think we should stop having such strong debates over this because I am very glad that at least a choice exists. There are some moms who really don't have a choice, and I'll bet some wish they did. And their kids turn out to be great people. I just wish we could have it all, I guess!

Tired of waiting?

Okay, my most recent experience for today is waiting in line to pick up my kindergartner. Is everyone really in that much of a hurry? So one mom decides that it's taking the staff too long to find the kids to get them in the cars ahead, so what does she do? Puts the car in park and gets out to find hers herself. And lo and behold, the cars in front of her are starting to move up. Meanwhile, I am stuck behind her trying to figure out if I should pull around or if she is on her way back. I don't get very long to make that decision because two other cars, who were not in the original line, mind you, pull around the entire line, see an open space, and pull in. Umm, hello, did you not see the long line of parents waiting to pick up their little one? I decide to pull out and go around the parked car just so no other cars can cut in. I make it up to the front and see the mom of the parked car barely going back and now rushing as she realizes how all the cars in line have now trapped her in. As I am waiting for them to get my son, another car pulls ahead of me, parks the car, and gets out to find his kid. Again, is everyone else behind you just in some random line because they like to wait? You would think they would at least rush out of the car and attempt to look like they are in a hurry. Nope, they just walk leisurely up to the entrance and kind of look around....no worries, there's no reason to hurry. I tell you it just drives me insane! There's a reason for the order....to prevent chaos, but some just believe they are too special for orders. Well, what if we all thought we were too special...what if we all tossed out all order...what if we all decided it's me or you?? It is just frustrating for those of us who understand the order and who follow it to keep order, not to make it easier for all you "special" people. For the record, these two parents were told the rules, and of course they nodded their heads - yeah, yeah - but they'll do it again. They already got away with it today. The staff should keep their faces in memory, so when they see them again, which you know they will, they can make these parents wait until every other child is picked up, and then they can get theirs. Since this is unlikely, I would settle for the parents being asked to move their car to the parking lot to park it or back to the end of the line.

Intro

This is my first experience with a blog, so I'll try my best to be interesting. This post will just be a little about me. I have a lot to say most of the time and am very opinionated, thus the name of my blog. I don't back down from confrontation and rather enjoy a good debate. I also don't think about what I say before it comes out, so I have been found to be offensive to some. I will admit that I am wrong, however, if I turn out to be. But really, is there a right and wrong when it comes to opinion? I can also be persuaded to the other side if I am presented with a good argument to do such. I try not to take anything personally and expect the same from others, but of course that depends entirely on who I'm dealing with. It also depends on whether or not the person is attacking an opinion or me! Anyway, I am going to be using this blog to vent, rant, rave, etc. on the thoughts in my head, and there are always plenty, and I have some catching up to do. I really hope that I don't overly insult anyone out there, but when you're opinionated, that's extremely hard not to do. We'll see how it goes....